Self-Regulation and the Seven Powers

Self-regulation is the main component of all Conscious Discipline practices. Being able to self-regulate means managing and controlling our thoughts, feelings, and actions.

As children are learning and growing, their first introduction to self-regulation is through their primary caregivers. Children do not yet have an inner voice so they will co-regulate to the adults they are surrounded by. What you say to them, around them, and about them becomes their self-reflection. This is why it is important for adults to build their own skills and manage their inner states so they can show up stronger and better for the children around them.

As children grow older, this inner voice shifts from their caregivers to what they watch, read, see, and hear from their peers and the world. If children have the building blocks of a strong inner voice from a young age, they will be able to better self-regulate as they grow older.

In Conscious Discipline, there are 7 Powers for Conscious Adults. These empower adults to self-regulate and provide a foundation to access our executive brain state. When one addresses these powers, they are able to attend to the needs of themselves and their children.

7 Ways to self regulate as an adult:

Power of perception: Take responsibility for our own upset

Power of unity: Perceive compassionately and offer compassion to others and ourselves

Power of attention: Create images of expected behavior in a child’s brain

Power of free will: Learn to connect and guide instead of force and coerce

Power of acceptance: Learn to respond to what life offers instead of attempting to make the world go our way

Power of love: Seek the best in others

Power of intention: Teach a new skill rather than punishing others for lacking skills we think they should possess